Thanks for all the suggestions. Yes, heating up the house with a lasagna in the oven might be a tad too much. You have great ideas though, and I'll take any recipes or links you might have.

It's humid in Tucson only in July and part of August. It's the monsoon season where we get the majority of our rain. Right now the humidity is 59%, which is very high for us. The rest of the year it's like 4%!!!

I kind of like the sandwich idea. You don't think the adults will say ummmmmmm......where is the sliced meat?

hey, has the party happened yet? how'd it go?


there are SOOO many types of food allergy, sensitivity, religious or personal values-restriction, and preference that honestly visiting adults, and the children who are in their care, need to take responbsibility for their own dietary needs or you, the party host, are transformed into a short-order cook, to paraphrase dietician/social worker Ellyn Satter.

there was a GREAT suggestion for vegetarians/vegans visiting someone else's house in Dr Neal Barnard's book "Food for Life." he recommends saying in advance to the host, "I prefer a meatless diet so i wondered if I could bring something, like a meatless spaghetti sauce or hummus and pita bread or a vegan potato salad." this gives the host an opporotunity to say, "oh, we always include plenty of vegetarian food" (and a few ideas for something he/sje can make or pick up to supplement the meal)...and on the other hand, they may be glad you are broinging something that will sastisfy your needs and complement thiers. it also alerts them ahead of time as to our preferences so they don't get their feeings hurt when yo say "no thank you" to the stacked enchiladas with chicken that they so paintakingly made...

when the shoe is on the other foot...if my child were allergic to dairy (or I were a heavy-duity conscientious vegan who wanted my child on a strict vegan diet), I might let the host know in advance and offer to bring a non-dairy ice cream or sorbet to share. if it;s a SEVERE allergy, such as a child who shouldn;t be in the same room with peanuts or soy (I've known kids like this; we had one in a preschool where I taught!) then the parent should be used to preparing the child in advance to wat only what is on his./her diet and maybe alerting the hosts. I'm very sensitive to vnegar in salads, and sometimes jsut offer to bring a lemon juice and olive oil-based salad or a special dressing to offer. I don;t considere it the host's job to special-prepare food for me of everyone else likes raspberry vinaigrrette or balsamic vinegar-pickled onions and tomatoes...

I feel strongly that it is NOT my duty as a host to find out every dietary quirk of every person who is attending an event. the parents have a responsibility to help their children eat right for them, and 5 eyars old is by no means too early to learn that some foods make you sick even if they are yummy for Sally and Rainbow. ki. it might be kind of thoughtless for me to serve a lemon cake with no alternative desserts if I know that one of the children, Billy let;'s say, there is seriously allergic. on the other hand, if I have choices of several desserts (chocolate OR carrot OR lemon cake) then it;s probably a pretty safe bet that Billy can eat one of those. if he is also allergic to wheat or vegan and can;t eat anything with eggs or milk...well, that's where Billy's parent really should step up and bring something to share that IS on Billy's diet.

it;s funny, the whole food-and-kids thing. I ujsut finished a summer pre-K teaching assignment with a group of 13 kids, all native speakers of Spanish. whose parents were mostly from mexico and/or Central America. the parents, and most of the kids, found the school ,unch food quite bland and boring. (it needs a little chile, commented one of the mothers about our packaged 'gringo burritos with beans and gooey cheese and not much else.) I told one of the moms that in the United States, we characteristically expect that children don't like strong-flavored food and it;s self-fulfilling prophecy 9though i don;t think i used that term)...if children are only given bland white foods, they don;t learn to eat anything else. the mother laughed and said that in Mexico, everyone liked chile and of course they gave it to their children! I said yes, it;s a cultural thing, children in the Middle east eat vegeatable salads all the time, even for breakfast, and lots of garlic and they really miss their vegetables when they visit the US.

anyway...my advice to all is make an attractive spread of food within our budget and let anyone with special problems with what YOU like figure out how to solve it. I'm not into the "mom needs to be a martyr to be a good hostess" ploy.

that being said, i DO get bitchy when I can;t get food I consider nutritious and tasty...so I will call first to see if I can bring anything...